From my youngest...
"I love your guts mom but don't talk to me!!!" (I really want to turn that into a bumper sticker)
After I kissed him...
him - "oh shit!!"
me- "what did you say?"
him- "I said shit because you kissed me!"
we then had a conversation about naughty words.
While on a bike ride he was singing his little heart out to Jingle Bells and then mid chorus stops to enquire, "mommy why do you drink coke?"
My oldest...
After telling him I loved him, "When people tell me they love me it makes me sick and I throw up in my mouth."
"hey daddy I have a really important secret to tell you.... BUUUUURPPPP!!" (he really burped in his fathers ear, and I laughed hysterically)
I was telling him that he was going to stay with his grandma while his father and I went on a date and he responded with, "does this mean we're having a third kid? 'Cause that's what happens when people go on dates."